Thursday, July 5, 2007
AKA Monty asks:
"I love men, but I've been single for a long time and at this point the thought of letting a man hold my remote control makes me break out in a cold sweat. Why do some women think that every woman needs a man to be complete, and to be happy?
I'm surprised whenever I run into this attitude, especially in this day and age."
I'm with you, AKA. It is surprising to run into that attitude today but it's definitely out there. Sometimes, it comes from women who actually do feel like they need men in their lives, unable to relate to the idea of not needing them.
The operative word here, though, is "need". Interestingly, I know many women who have been divorced or widowed for many years who have chosen to live alone. I don't know quite as many men in the same situation. For some of these men, "need" is what drives them to get into live-in situations quickly. For the women, they've found that the pros of being the mistresses of their own domains outweigh the cons of giving up the remote control.
I'm a firm believer in "never say never" (hell, I once said I'd never get married!), but if someday you choose to live with or marry someone it will be because you choose to, not because you need to. What you've come to realize is that you are fine alone, and that it might not be such a bad idea to have your own home base even if you find yourself in love again.
OK, we have to stop now.